Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Just Some Oscar Ranting

I usually don't take the time to sit and watch the Oscars.

This year I watched most of the Academy Awards with my family.  My daughter Victoria likes the award shows.  She gets some humor out of watching people/celebrities and hearing what comes out of their mouths.
Plus, Ellen Degeneres was pretty darn funny, so we had that going for us.

I actually got so caught up in the antics, that I forgot my daughter in Korea was going to be emailing me for a bit.  Once I remembered, I left the tv room and went and "chatted" with her for the rest of the show.

Apparently I missed the 'good' stuff.

I missed John Travolta's mangling of names.  I still am not quite sure what happened there.  I popped onto Facebook the next morning and there is a name generator posted at his expense..it tells you what your name would be if John Travolta were to attempt saying it.

Kind of funny.

If you aren't John Travolta.

But to give the guy credit, it wasn't like he was trying to say an easy name.  I mean, Idina Menzel? People who have known me for years still pronounce my last name incorrectly.  And I call my daughter Olivia "Ka-Kel-Olivia" on a regular basis. People who don't even know I have a sister named Diane, will call me Diane.  Which is weird, but I still answer to it because growing up my mom called me "Di-Sue-Whoever You Are". So you see where I got it. (Thanks for that mom :) )

So you deal with it and move on.

Or create a quiz and post it on Facebook for the masses to mock the error openly.

I also missed Matthew McConaughey's acceptance speech for Best Actor.

Another buzz on the ol' Facebook social media frenzy.

It seemed to start out with shock that Mr. McConaughey would be so crass as to thank God for His hand in the opportunities he had been given throughout his career.  Shock enough that the celebrities were "lukewarm" with that statement.  It seems to me that it basically shows how far the more liberal celebrities (who are very much in the majority in that area of employment) have strayed from God. It appeared to make them a bit uncomfortable that he would mention God.  Because if God really has a hand in people's lives, then how can they keep their neurotic selfish Me-Me-Me type attitudes? --and I realize I am generalizing and that there are many lovely celebrities out there who would be great to know and who are down to earth and who use their power for good, but because of the reaction from the audience during his speech, I am going with my generalization. Lukewarm is not how Matthew McConaughey's speech should have been received.  He just won the flipping Oscar, for goodness sake.  Applaud the man. Don't panic because he is showing that even for all his naked drumming and his really hard work at getting ready for roles like the one that won him this Oscar, he is still a believer in that Deity. A believer that God knows him and helps him with his choices, and is pleased with him.

I can picture the other celebrities now....

"Well this is uncomfortable.  Let's just clap softly.  Maybe a golfer's clap...

Did he just say that we might actually have to acknowledge that our gift and talent isn't just us, but might be a God-given blessing?

Well, doesn't that beat all?

No, that can't possibly be right.  But just to be safe, let's ignore that part of the speech now."

Heaven forbid they have a 'come to Jesus' moment and have to realize that there is a God.  He is aware of them.  He loves them even with all their self-absorbed lifestyles and their ease at breaking any given commandment at will.  Usually that adultery one.  Which, to be fair, seems to be a sticking point for even the common folk. (But the percentage of lasting marriages for people in the entertainment industry are dismal...so it makes me wonder at the morals and beliefs and integrity of those who choose to gain celebrity).  But that is a topic for another time & I am rambling myself off track...

No.  They don't want to keep talking about his comments on God's part in his career and life.  Nope. Now they want the focus on McConaughey to be the part where he thinks of himself as his own hero.

For rude.

Seriously?  People are upset about this one?  That is a shaky cover for trying not to discuss the God issue.  Deflect the focus off God and onto his Hero complex. That will work.

Geez.

Pushing back his goal of looking up to himself every ten years isn't a bad thing.  What, you want him to look up to one of you other celebrities who just gave him a golf clap when he had the nerve to mention God in his acceptance speech?  Seriously.

From my perspective I think it is great that he is his own hero. He is setting goals.  He is trying to achieve them.  And ten years later instead of thinking he is all that, he re-sets his goals another ten years to push himself even more and to become the kind of man that he can look up to.

It would be great if there were someone else out there that he could look up to, but setting yourself to a higher standard and then aiming yourself that way so that ten years from now you can see your growth..but then instead of patting yourself on the back for being so awesome, you set the goals even higher so that you are always reaching for self-improvement?

And you are keeping God into the equation so that you are still grounded?

How is that wrong?

The answer is, it isn't.  What IS wrong is when people--whether that be celebrities, politicians, other public officials, church leaders (any church) or anyone with a job in which others look up to you--so yes, that includes Stay-at-home Moms, teachers, etc-- aren't setting themselves to higher standards.  You have people watching you.  You have people learning from you, depending on you.  Whether that person is your child, your employee, your co-worker, or your biggest fan.  Everyone is being watched.

The key is to get everyone to set higher goals.  Be your own hero.  Be someone worthy of being someone else's hero so that Matthew McConaughey can find someone in his business that he can strive to be like.

Be that boss that your employees know is fair and understanding.

Be that parent that your child wants to grow up and emulate.

But even more than that, don't forget God.

Because even if the rest of the world lets you down and there isn't one single person worthy of your consideration as someone to look up to, God is there. Hoping that you will succeed.  Hoping you will be happy even through the difficult times that everyone faces.  And mostly, hoping that you will remember Him. Remember all He has done and will do for you. Because when it comes down to it, He loves you.  No matter what your job, age, size, color, or if you were never even nominated at the Academy Awards.

And you know what?  When you work hard and do your best in whatever it is you do, even if the rest of the world gives you a lukewarm golf clap, God is there on His feet giving you a standing ovation.







Monday, February 17, 2014

I Am the Parent of a Bully

Hot button topics seem to be in abundance these days. Most seem to be of a political slant--Obamacare, gun control, gay marriage, etc.

I am not going to voice my opinion on the political.  I will just say that I am conservative.  I think shooting guns is fun. I don't like that my health insurance changed this year--but it had nothing to do with Obamacare, so I would hate that part anyway.  And I have friends and family who are gay--where the most controversial topic on that one that I have ever voiced was to a good friend of mine after we had a lunch date with another friend of ours who happens to be a married lesbian that went something like this:

Me: This is going to sound weird, but I don't 'get' lesbians.  And yet I sort of understand the draw for gay men.
Friend: That is because you are heterosexual.
Me: Oh. [pause] That totally makes sense.
Friend: Of course it does.

But those topics aren't what I wanted to write about. Nope.  The topic I wanted to discuss is much nearer to my heart. And sanity. And every grey hair on my head that you would be able to see if I didn't get it colored by the lovely Lori every 8 weeks.  Like clockwork.

The topic for today's blog is 'BULLYING"

Ah.  Overdone you say?

Perhaps.You will hear people yelling STOP BULLYING constantly.  You will read articles about how awful it is for the life of the bullied child. How we can stop these bullies. How we need to teach them the right way to behave around others. There is A LOT of literature and helps and media access about being bullied that can help those in that situation.

My take is a bit different than that.

I am the parent of a bully.

I am also the parent of a child who is bullied--but thankfully not by my other child.

So I live both sides of the equation. And while I completely understand the fervor in which people discuss how to stop bullying and how awful it is--I do understand, it is a sad state that we live in where kids empathy for other kids is non-existent in some. Where suicides can be linked back to bullying.  It is sad and scary and we all want it to stop.

But I want to talk about the other end. We don't talk much about the bully. Or being a parent of a bully.

Frankly, it sucks.

I have this cute kid who has no empathy and no grasp at all of consequences.

And sometimes that cute kid turns into YOUR child's nightmare.

For no apparent reason.

And that right there is the hard part for me.  He doesn't single one kid out and pick on him or her. He can be best friends with the child he bullies.And then in one quick instant he hurts or teases or yells at that friend.

And then 10 minutes later he is back to wanting to be best buddies.  Not realizing that what he did those 10 minutes ago makes it so the other child really wants nothing to do with him anymore.

And I get a phone call to come get him from school.  And he is mad and pouty for a long time after we get home--especially since he knows the drill.  Suspended from school?  No relaxing day off for you, my friend.  You get to help me with all my housework jobs. Some I didn't even know I needed to do today. Any other punishment will be discussed when your dad gets home from work and he and I figure out what to do this time that might actually make you pay attention next time and make the better choice.

And I hope beyond hope that I don't get a visit or phone call from the other kid's parents.  Because usually they are--rightfully--angry, and want to fix blame on someone.  But instead of blaming the child, I get blamed for my lack of parenting skills. (In their mind...and probably in most people's minds when they hear about a bully)

Now, I agree that there are some parents who do nothing to stop their kid from bully tendencies. Parents who see aggression as a good thing. Parents who think the other kid was probably 'asking for it'.

Or my 'favorite'--"Not MY kid. He/she would never do something like that."  The head-in-the-sand parent who doesn't believe the teachers, administration, students, neighbors, random strangers, that their kid is the problem.

Those parents are hard pressed in my book to ever be part of the solution.

However, there are some parents, like myself, who have done everything possible to ensure that this kid who is a bully, figures out how to be a productive human being. We try therapy.  For both him and for my husband and I just to figure out how to raise him right. We have him in special after school tutoring programs independent of public schools, to try and raise his competency in schoolwork and his ability to focus on tasks, so that maybe in an ideal world this will start to sink in and he will not be distracted by others and he will learn that he can do his work and not have to be drawn into everyone else's business.  How to make GOOD choices. We involve him in competitive sports to try and get some of that energy out so, frankly, he is too tired at the end of the day to put up much effort to be a bully. And, most importantly, we praise him like crazy when we catch him making good choices.

Seriously, if my child could learn two things we all seem to take for granted, his life would be so much happier. Empathy and consequences.  HUGE difference in his life if those two things would 'stick'.

And that part right there about his life being so much happier?  Well, most people don't think about the bully as the one who is unhappy and having problems and needing positive help. We see the bully as the instigator. We see their victims.  But we have difficulty ourselves in having that same empathy toward the bully.

It is always harder to like the mean kid.

And it is an easy way out to blame the parents. Or the lack of parenting. Or the media. Or Obama. Or gay marriage.

Blame doesn't help. Finding the solution helps. Not jumping to conclusions about the parenting skills of the bully helps. Helping the parents of the bully if they DO lack the skill necessary to redirect the hard to raise child.

I have 6 other children. This one kid takes more time and money and effort than any of the other six combined.  I am not sitting around hoping he grows out of it. (I did that when he was in his 'terrible twos'..then his three's--figuring he would grow out of it when he was four--then five--then six...then we realized it was a figure it out or he ends up in jail someday type of moment and we worked like crazy to figure him out enough to hopefully help him)

So with all my therapy, and learning curves, and advice (asked for and not) that I have been given over the last couple of years, what have I learned that I could possibly share with other parents who are in my same boat? Because you know there are a lot of parents out there who are in my situation--if there weren't, we wouldn't have all the anti-bullying campaigns.

I have learned that not everything works every time. One time I can give him an ultimatum or a chance to make a better choice and he will choose wisely.  And the next time I can offer him those same things and he goes hard the other direction.

I have learned that for my son, empathy might have to always be something that he has to consciously consider. It isn't natural for him to have empathy right now. Therapists have taught him how to recognize other people's feelings, which was good.  But honestly, I don't think he actually cares what other people think or feel.  So I have learned that I must teach him--repeatedly, as often as needs be and then ten times more for good measure--that he HAS to consider the other person's feelings when making choices that might affect someone else. Short of tattooing 'The Golden Rule' on his forehead, this one has been tough. But I have high hopes that someday it might stick.

I have learned that people will think I am a bad parent. It doesn't matter what we are doing or have done to help our son give up his bullying tendencies. Other parents don't know what we have done. They imagine we are those other parents who figure it isn't our kid, boys will be boys, grunt, grunt...etc. etc.  They don't know that we have been told by our own family therapist--who is awesome by the way--that we need to pay attention to our son and if we see him start getting wound up or getting himself in a potentially bad situation where at the minimum a meltdown from him might occur, that we need to redirect RIGHT THEN. If my son makes a bad choice, it is already too late for me to punish him in any manner that will be effective. Because my son doesn't understand the concept of consequences.  This one is a hard one. If I send my other son to a time out, or take his xbox away for punishment, he understands why.  He tries to make better choices next time so it doesn't happen again.  If my bully son gets sent to time out, he doesn't get it.  He knows he did something wrong.  He knows WHAT he did wrong. He knows the time out is because of that choice. But he doesn't really get that the choice he made caused the punishment received. And because of that, he also flat out doesn't care when he is punished.

Sent to his room for an hour? Whatever.

So, in order to keep my son from making a bad choice I have to pay close attention to his moods, his environment, etc. and then redirect his focus if it looks like it might go bad. Even if that is a quick, "Hey, can you take the dog for a walk around the block?" Done. He loves to do that and it makes his mind focus away from whatever was starting to cause a break down to begin with.

That is actually harder to do than you'd think. Which is where the people thinking I am a bad parent comes in. My therapist warned me about it.  He is right. Once my son makes that bad choice, it makes no sense to punish him. Not in a way that the outside world thinks is appropriate for a bully. He will get a time out.  He will get another discussion on which choice would have been better. But in our reality, it simply doesn't work. He has to be redirected BEFORE the action. And his teachers at school are all aware of this too--it wouldn't be fair to them or to him if they didn't have that particular heads up.  So we are lucky in that his teachers are great at paying attention to him and they have been known to have my son take a folded blank sheet of paper to the office for them.  To run an "errand"--made up though it is--so that he gets his focus somewhere else and can re-center himself before the bully emerges.

I have learned that some kids are just plain bullies.  And some kids have parents who need a crash course on reality with their child. And it is a pain to be lumped into categories that just aren't the whole story.

I have learned that praise to the child who is a bully goes a long way to getting him into a spot where he is more open to direction.

And I have learned that if you take off a bedroom door, it can no longer be slammed over and over and over.  And over.  While that child tries to make a non-vocal point. (Yes, that he is mad he is being sent to his room.  Again.)

And if your bully child starts throwing things in anger, if you then get to choose anything from his possessions to keep for yourself for each item he throws, he will throw fewer things. (You can't just keep the item he or she throws...they get smart and actually look around the room to throw things they don't care if they have or not...you have to take something, for a little while anyway, that they care about....part of having an intelligent bully :) )

Be an advocate for your child. Find teachers who actually care that your child is successful. If that isn't happening in your school now--find a school that has qualified teachers who aren't jaded and who know how important it is to have your kid find purpose. And someone besides family to back them up.

I don't know if this will help anyone.  But I hope it at least lets someone know that if they are a parent of a bully, they aren't alone.  Not by a long shot.  But also, that there is someone out there who feels for you. Who is on your side and hopes you come out of the 'parenting a bully joy' with most of your sanity still intact. Give up now on keeping your hair color. Grey is the new you. :)  But there comes a time when there are fewer meltdowns. Fewer calls from the school.

I am still waiting for those times...but I know they are there. ;)

Just do your best. Find reasons to praise your child. Redirect behavior. And don't worry about what other parents think.  If you are doing your best and it is working...stick to your guns.  If you are doing your best and you are still struggling, find yourself help. Talk to someone who knows what they are doing. Be open minded--because at least 50% of the time it really is your child.  Don't ignore that fact and fall into the "not my child" syndrome. It doesn't help you or your child to bury your head in the sand and hope he or she just grows out of it.

Bullying is a hot topic for a reason.

Good parents want what is best for their child.

And you are a good parent. So do what you need to do to get a handle on the bullying child.

I am trying to do just that.  Daily.

And I love him just as much with a bedroom door as without. :)





"Let me sum up" 2014 Blog Post Numero One

Apparently I am not great at maintaining a regular blog.  Not a single post in 2013. Or in 2012.  Two whole years with zero posts to my blog.  And only four posts in 2011--and all four of those were in the month of April.

I have no idea what that means.

Except that time got away from me.  Or for the last two plus years I have had nothing to write home about.

Must be that first one. "Let me explain--no, there is too much--let me sum up.."

Since April 2011 I have had two daughters graduate from high school (2011 & 2012).  I have had one of those daughters graduate from Western Wyoming Community College with both Associate of Arts and Associate of Science degrees--having gone there on academic and soccer scholarships.  This same daughter is now serving an LDS mission in the Arizona, Phoenix mission since February of 2013 and will be home this coming August (2014).  The 2nd daughter also went to college--got in one year at Dixie State University with a partial academic scholarship.  And she, too, is serving an LDS mission.  But she is in Korea, Seoul.  She left Sept 11, 2013 and will be back March of 2015.

(Feel free to read their letters home--I am mostly caught up with their blogs...a little behind..but not 2 years, so that is something...  sisterkaitlyntolley.blogspot.com and sisterraqueltolley.blogspot.com )

That isn't nothing.  That is a lot of something. :)

And that is just two of my kids.

My husband has changed jobs twice in that time.

Our poodle died.

We got a whippet.

Our 3rd daughter has a driver's license.

Our older son is now 14 and taller than me.

Our younger son is an awesome soccer goalie on his comp team and he is also officially ADD, so with meds and more patience than I thought I had, we are coming to an understanding.  I am understanding that parenting is harder than it looks--even with having 5 kids before this son came into our family--and he is understanding that in order to not have to live in his room for the rest of his life from being grounded 24/7, he has to start taking responsibility for his actions.  We are getting there.  Much more slowly than I want, but at least we are progressing.  Most days. :)

Our 4th daughter is also a soccer machine, playing center defense on her competition team.  She has also been taking art lessons.

Our youngest daughter is playing rec soccer (prefers scoring goals over stopping them, so talks her coach into letting her play forward as much as possible), and is in art this year with daughter #4.  This kid has also developed a huge love of horses, and is still trying to learn the art of reading.  It is taking her longer, and is frustrating to her.  But we hope she will get there.

For me, I have been NOT writing.  Not in my blog, not on my unfinished novel.  Nothing.  I have read a lot.  I have started a business painting wall murals.  Well, I painted one giant wall mural last year for a couple who built a new home.  I painted their bonus room above their garage.  It was a big room  A big job.  Took me three months to complete, but it ended up being pretty awesome, if I do say so myself.  This is a link to a youtube video their son took of the finished room.  It doesn't show it to it's best advantage--there are a TON of details that are left out of this short clip, but you can get an idea..

Bonus Room at the Young's

I would like to work at doing more, but that younger son of mine has a school schedule that makes it a bit difficult at this time.  So when I get my scheduling under some sort of control that will make me not seem so flaky, then I will pursue more painting jobs.

 It is mid-February now...enough time has passed that I don't have to consider my next paragraph a New Year's Resolution. So here goes...

I am going to have a goal (NOT a resolution) to write MUCH more frequently on this blog.

Apparently just posting this entry means I have already met said goal...:)

But, to be more specific, I plan on writing a decent entry at least once per week.  And by decent, I mean not so much rambling nothingness, and hopefully a little more substance.

If for no other reason than to shock those who know me into realizing that I actually have an opinion.  Not that I care what they think.  But some have been known to show genuine surprise that I would speak up in situations--i.e. when I was on jury duty--and others who seem set back a bit if something funny comes from my mouth.

Which I find a bit rude.

Like my husband is the only one allowed a sense of humor in my family.

Granted, he is funny.  And he is a loud talker.  So people hear him more. :)  That, and most of my 'jokes' are now mumbled under my breath because I have found that I am still not old enough to get away with off-color comments.  The one boon to old age--freedom of expression and speech. In a 'that's what she said' type of atmosphere. :)

So there you have it.  My goal is now written down and on the interweb...so it must all be true.

And now I have documentation, so hopefully that will put my writing self back in gear.

We shall see.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Napa Valley Ragnar--kill me now...

Have I ever mentioned that I hate running?

I love soccer. I can play soccer all day long. But jogging? For fun/exercise/whatever? No thank you.

And yet, even with that definite attitude toward running, I have handed over my check for my entry fee to the 2011 Napa Valley Ragnar.

That is a running relay race.

Running.

On purpose.

I have until September 17th to get my buttocks in shape enough to not completely die in a relay race with 11 other people on my team.

My sister Susan is the runner. She enjoys it. She goes on vacation--big time vacations, like Aruba on her anniversary trip--and still takes the time to get out and run.

For fun.

I don't get that even a little.

Susan is going to be on the Ragnar team with me..it is her group that is doing it and she is letting me join in. She might regret it later, but I hope to have garnered a little better relationship with running by then than my hate/hate relationship I have now.

I am also running the Ragnar with my husband and with my 2nd daughter Raquel. Both of whom are the type who can run for a long time and not want to kill somebody.

Barely break a sweat.

I don't find them fun when running.

I let Raquel run with me last week and the stink ran backwards the whole time and wouldn't stop talking.

And expected me to respond to her questions and comments. Like I could take time from gasping for air to chat.

My 7 year old daughter rode her bike alongside while I ran and kept saying things like "You sure run slow, Mom"..and "I am pretty sure I could run faster than you." So I took her little bike from her and rode while she ran the rest of the way home.

Ha.

Showed her.

(Actually, she ran easily and quickly and still looked at me as if I were a huge disappointment..I am going to pretend it is because a 40-something year old woman probably should avoid riding a purple 20" bike, but I am not dim enough to really believe that)

I am posting my Ragnar decision here so it is public. I cannot back out. I am holding myself accountable.

If you see me jogging on the street please refrain from all laughter and rude comments.

It is always funny to yell "Run faster! You're winning!" to total strangers who are out jogging. Not so funny to be on the receiving end of that one.

So there you have it. I am running in the Napa Valley Ragnar. I'm sure the scenery will be marvelous even if I see most of it from between my knees as I am bent over sucking air.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Music Videos for your Viewing & Listening Pleasure

The first video is the Hoobastank video I mentioned in my previous blog...if you got that far to notice. I like this song a lot.






And this one is an '80's favorite, although I don't remember the weirdness of the video...I guess 80's and 'weird video' are synonymous. :)





And since I am a mostly closet country listener eer since having a lovely Texan roommate Tammy who showed us all some tolerance for the genre, (although I usually only like the funny songs, like 'I'm Still a Guy' by Brad Paisley) here is one from Toby Keith that my whole family gets a kick out of:



That's it. Just 3 songs for you to enjoy today.

At least I posted again and didn't wait another 6 months like usual..:)

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

My 100th Post :)

That is a lot of rambling...


In recognition of my 100th blog post I am going to make a list of random facts about me. Things I like, don't like. Things I find fascinating. Random. 100 of them, so random will be key. :) And yes, it is about me and my world...so you can just wait for blog #101 if you don't want to suffer through this. ;-D


1. I like Hershey's chocolate bars dipped in Jif peanut butter. Not Reeses. I mean the 'homemade' "You got your chocolate on my peanut butter!" stuff.


2. My favorite dinner since I was a kid is spaghetti.


3. I love dogs...but that said:


4. I don't like schnauzers or basset hounds.


5. Pet peeve #1-people's spelling errors with the to, too, two; your, you're; their, there, & they're


6. I don't know how to snow ski, but have lived in Utah my whole life. (It is the stopping I don't do well...)



7. I have actually gotten to the point where I have to do math to remember how old I am.


8. Favorite dessert type item: Kneader's Bakery's fruit tart. That is one dessert I would 'cheat' with and not feel one bit of remorse.


9. I don't like putting laundry away


10. Apparently I'm a "white" on the color code chart. Not really sure what that means.


11. I don't believe in palm readers/fortune tellers, but refuse to go to one 'just in case'. Which probably means I don't want to hear anything bad because I will worry..


12. Pet peeve #2-People who sing really loudly and really badly all at the same time without realizing that they are hurting the ears of everyone within 10 miles because they are positive they are most excellent at singing. Except when I am the one who is singing. That doesn't bug me. At that point people who are peeved at my singing bug me.


13. I get a kick out of people when they find out I knew and dated Doug before my mission. They still have the mindset that if a girl has the opportunity she should get married instead of going on a mission. For some that is probably true. For me it was never an option--I had my decision to go on a mission set since I was 8. It never crossed my mind to stay home and get married instead.


14. I don't like my kids to have the candy 'Nerds'. The reason? They have never, EVER had some without dumping most of them on the floor.


15. I also hugely dislike Easter grass in Easter baskets for basically the same reason...I find Easter grass all over the house. In July. It seems to expand and grow and multiply. Not unlike Easter bunnies...


16. I have a tendency to go to boutiques and shops looking for home furnishings/wall hangings/etc and end up getting nothing because I am sure I can do just as good of job painting a picture or making some sort of decoration just as well as what I could buy...and thus save a lot of money. I don't take into consideration that I never find time to make these things, so I go a long time with bare walls and little home decor.


17. I don't like sad movies. Happy endings are half the fun of a movie, so if it makes me cry but doesn't make me feel better at the wrap-up, I don't like it.


18. I have never seen the movie "Titanic" because of #17.


19. I want to learn how to play the guitar


20. I think it would be fun to learn to ride a motorcycle, but the whole hands, feet, shift, brake, gas thing is too much for my simple brain and coordination so I am fairly certain that I would learn and then I would crash. So actually learning to ride a motorcycle isn't very high on my list of things to do once I remember that part.


21. I have mentioned before that I am a decent ventriloquist because of liking to sing to my car radio without drivers around me realizing that I am belting out show tunes. Well, now I have decided that cell phones have made that trick unnecessary. I can sing and pretend I'm on my hands-free phone and no one bats an eye anymore. As long as I remember to not bob and weave aka:dance at the same time. That sort of throws it off a bit.


22. I think people should look at me and be surprised that I'm not 10 years younger than my real age. I don't feel this old so I can't possibly LOOK this old. Right? I know, I know...no one is surprised and I should just be glad people don't think I look 10 years OLDER than my real age. [that isn't nearly as satisfying to my ego...]


23. I am eating peanut M&M's right now and they are NOT part of my diet. [muahaha....]


24. I like to golf


25. I am allergic to walnuts. If I eat them they give me canker sores. Which is unpleasant, but sometimes I eat them anyway just to live on the edge. (And if they happen to be encased in caramel and chocolate..)


26. I have the best parents in the world. :)


27. One of my favorite songs is 'The Reason' by Hoobastank. Interesting music video too which I will post as post #101 so you can hear it..


28. What in the heck does 'Hoobastank' mean and why did they make that the name of their band??


29. On the birth order charts, I don't think I fit many of the 'oldest child' category listings..except for the part about not liking change. And maybe the part about being bossy. ;)


30. I think I am hilarious. Even when no one else does.


31. Sometimes I catch my reflection in my car window and am surprised at how old I am. Dang it.


32. I've stopped watching very much tv. The only thing I watch really is Sportscenter. It started out as wind down time with Doug after the kids are in bed. Ends up being me watching while he falls asleep on the couch. (Stupid car reflection is rubbing off on every other aspect of my life showing me getting older..)


33. I've learned the hard way to never ask questions you really don't want to truthful answer for. Like "Who looks older, me or that person (who looks at least 10 yrs older than me...to me)over there?"; or "Do I look like I've gained weight?"


34. My favorite chocolate like item for the past couple of years is chocolate covered cinnamon bears. Love them.


35. Food storage is fine and dandy until you realize half of what you have expired 3 years ago. Apparently 'rotate' isn't in my storage vocabulary.


36. Zumba is fun.


37. I see joggers and wish I thought jogging was fun. But I hate jogging. (probably should have capitalized the 'h' in that...)


38. I am really, really bad at making sure I serve a vegetable with dinner. I'm not fond enough of vegetables in general to want to make them. I only like them when served to me. :)


39. I think one of the reasons why I am a Primary teacher in my church is so that I will go home on Sundays liking my own kids more...because:


40. Other people's children drive me a little nuts. Not all of them. Just a select few.


41. I don't feel bad about #40 because I have kids of my own who fill that same reality for all other Primary (and school) teachers. And, lets be honest, most neighbors too.


42. One of the best places in the world to 'people watch' is the State Fair. Holy moley.


43. On the lines of #42, I have begun the self-entertainment of secretly taking photos of some of the most..interesting..characters I run across at large public places..like the fair and Lagoon. But not in a creepy way. Somehow this one doesn't sound quite right...


44. Why is it that the very second you start a healthy eating regimine, you suddenly have a plethora of junk food in your house?


45. 'Plethora' is a funky word.


46. I always thought I was a decent speller...but I am a huge fan of the spell checker.


47. I really, really, really like my Nook eReader.


48. I am a most excellent 2nd in command. In my opinion, I do better when I have to keep track of what other people are doing--i.e. I think I was a much better junior companion than senior comanion on my mission. So I don't do totally in charge well...but am good at keeping the one who is in charge in line and on task. (Okay, I nag...)


49. I get annoyed by stupid people a lot more quickly than I used to..which annoys me more because I can feel the inherited scowly furrows between my eyebrows deepen as I unintentionally give them my 'you've got to be kidding me' look.


50. I'm halfway to the end of this blog post. Still with me?


51. I'm glad I can blame my 'scowly furrows' on an inherited facial feature. I would hate for the furrows to be there just because I am ornery. :)


52. Two favorite college traditions--and I will put them in two numbers because 100 items are getting harder to come up with--1. Studying for finals with roommates and taking a break at 2 a.m. by driving to Denny's for hot chocolate and a side of hashbrowns.


53. And 2., also a food tradition during finals: eating oatmeal cookie dough.


54. Speaking of which, I really don't like oatmeal cookies. The dough I love. The cookies, not so much. Unless there are raisins in the dough and then I wouldn't touch it with a 10 ft. pole..Ick.


55. In case you couldn't tell...I don't like raisins.


56. I also don't like olives or celery. I've tried my whole life to like those things, but just plain don't.


57. My favorite daughter, nay, my favorite child is Victoria.


58. I have funny kids..as you can tell by #57 when I left this blog up and someone took over. :) I love them all.


59. I eat some foods weird...for example, I really prefer to eat a Snickers by eating the bottom part first and then the top. So I eat the nugat off and then leave the caramel/peanut part for last. This particular habit drives my husband crazy. But he is the type to eat an Oreo like any old cookie and not take it apart. So what does he know? :)


60. If Snickers would come in a version of only carmel and peanuts it would make both me AND my husband happy. Me, because it would no longer be a drawn out process for eating it, and my husband because he would no longer get disgusted with seeing me dissect a candy bar.


61. Much to my embarassment, I am a sympathy crier. I was much 'tougher' before my mission. Could hold it back better. Now there is no stopping it. Darn it all.


62. If I had monthly discretional funds, I would pay to have someone else clean my house. Total no brainer on that one.


63. When I was a teenager, I looked forward to being 26. I thought I would be single, have a german shepherd and a Jeep..and 26 seemed old enough to be finally considered an adult, but young enough to have lots of fun. Instead at 26 I was married with a baby and one more on the way—I did have a german shepherd though.. Funny how real life is usually a bit different than you expect. It was at that time a completely different kind of ‘fun’. I never thought I would be 26 watching Barney for my ‘fun’. :)


64. Even after years of dealing with my computer, I still consider myself computer illiterate. I do things the hard way with the computer programs. Kind of annoying to see Doug zip through an Excel worksheet inserting all kinds of fun and having it work out quickly, after I have just spent an hour doing what just took him 3 minutes.


65. Coming up with 100 thoughts, things about me, etc. is harder than I thought. I started this stupid blog entry 4 months ago.


66. I have a most excellent husband. I am very proud of all he accomplishes at work and at church. He knows practically everyone in the Stake from being on the high council for the last 5+ years, and I can honestly say that he genuinely likes everyone he meets and they seem to all genuinely like him back. He loves public speaking and it shows in the talks he gives. They are always filled with humor and insight and even I get compliments on his behalf once he has spoken to a ward or group from people who were touched by something he said or did.


67. I, on the other hand, hate public speaking..have a hard time keeping names and faces right, and prefer to be anti-social. So we are a good balance. :)


68. One thing I can do, however, that Doug cannot, is list descriptions and traits of pretty much every AKC recognized breed of dog, and some that aren’t recognized. It is a skill, like anything else. Not one to really brag about I suppose…but it is something. :)


69. I hate all things math. I can actually feel my brain rebel against working when I look at a math problem. Mostly because I look at a math problem and can’t really figure out where the question is. Fractions make my head hurt.


70. Hallelujah, only 30 more of these to go. Are you still reading along? Or are you skim reading the same way I am skim writing?


71. I love to read. I am a fast reader, so I can whip through a book quickly which makes me feel a little less guilty about reading when I should be cleaning instead.


72. My favorite cereal as a kid was ‘Freakies’. Discontinued for a long time now. Here is a picture of the box: 73. Favorite cereals now are still from that time..I like Count Chocula & BooBerry & Frankenberry cereals. Harder to find except around Halloween, which might actually be why I like them so much still.


74. We have always loved German Shepherds, but since I insist on our next dog being a mostly indoor dog, and GSD’s shed more than anything and would drive us all crazy to live in that amount of dog hair, we are looking to find a new breed of dog to own. If anyone has a suggestion, our criteria is the following—large size, more rare breed (i.e. not a lab or something that everyone seems to have…not necessarily rare in the exact sense), low shedding, good with people. We are open to suggestions.


75. The very best place to have a hot dog is at a ball park. (duh)


76. Mariah will be in 1st grade next year. So that means I will get to finally go back to school and finish my degree. Too darn bad I STILL have no idea what I want that degree to be in. If I could find a job instead I would probably do that. But I think I need a degree to be more employable. For all the jokes about how much a homemaker does and how to put it all on a resume, I don’t see employers going for that whole shpeel.


77. I think back on things my mom allowed me to do and wonder to myself “What was she thinking??” Letting us ride our bikes from our home in Bountiful to my dad’s work in SLC…by taking a busy-even-then Redwood Road from Bountiful to 1100 South in SLC? My kids wish I were as nice as Grandma Jamie. I get cranky when they want to go to the Smith’s a mile away that has sidewalks the whole way and only one light to cross.


78. I still wish I had a Jeep. Or a Lotus Elise. :) Playing xbox GT2000 made me really like the Lotus.


79. I might be the worse player ever for Halo, but that GT2000 was MINE. I owned that game. Beat everyone. Which is probably why the family enjoys beating me at Halo now. I just can’t get the controller and my head to match up…I try to make it look up, it looks down. Every time.


80. I can’t believe I still have to come up with 20 more of these things…if you are still reading—more power to ya.


81. I like to fish.


82. I don’t know how to fly-fish.


83. We have a wall mural in my house that I painted that when completely finished will be a subtle mockery of everyone who has the cheesy sayings in vinyl on their walls. Mine will have vinyl sayings too…but it will have quotes like “Be excellent to each other.” –Bill S Preston, Esquire. I’m looking forward to the completed wall.


84. I don’t think Doug wanted me to let everyone know about #83. I think part of the fun was going to be seeing everyone read the quotes and weeding out kindred spirits by those who ‘got’ the humor, and those who just see a nice quote. :)


85. I hope you realize that this post might put me off posting for awhile again. My ideas are already sporadic on blog topics…this one is throwing me right off the edge.


86. I personally realize that this post will probably put anyone reading my blog off my blog indefinitely. Sorry about that.


87. One of my favorite sayings is the Murphy’s Law—“All things being equal, a fat person requires more soap than a thin person.” Unfortunately I think about that saying almost every time I take a shower. Annoying really. But I still like the quote.


88. Favorite actors of mine(please see previous blog for lovely photos of these guys)…for their acting ability and/or handsome good looks: Cary Grant, Josh Duhamel, Colin Firth and Ryan Reynolds.


89. Favorite actress of Doug’s..I think more for the handsome good looks although she is a good actress too: Halle Berry


90. I don’t have a favorite restaurant. I don’t like having to pick a place to go eat, because I honestly don’t care. I wish I cared. I like to eat. I like the Market Street Grills, Ruth’s Chris, etc., but I also am just as happy at IHOP or Kneaders. Guess I’m an easy date.


91. My oldest daughter is going away to college in the fall. I’m going to miss her.


92. I am not looking forward to my kids getting married and having kids. It will make me a grandmother. Once you get that title, you can no longer pretend to be young. No matter your actual age. Once you have ‘grandma’ tacked next to your name, you have a whole different persona..if not to yourself, to everyone else.


93. I don’t like minivans.


94. I am a breast cancer survivor..but it is hard for me to think of it that way. It feels like I didn’t go through enough compared to all of the other women that needed chemo, etc. to fight it. All I had was a mastectomy and reconstruction. I’m not complaining..I just think other women fought more valiantly. I was very, very blessed to have found it early enough to not have to go through more than I did.


95. Almost there….do these ones count? I’m counting them. Shows everyone how I like to cut corners. :)


96. My first car was an ’84 Ford Escort hatchback. I loved that car. It was an oxidized blue and it got me to Dixie and back umpteen times. My brother totaled it. Luckily he was unhurt, but my poor car went to junkyard heaven.


97. My first job outside of working for my dad, was as a waitress at a small diner in Bountiful. I didn’t last long. I hated that job.


98. I wish I spoke better Portuguese. I think I might take lessons sometime and finally try to get those verbs down pat.


99. I love DisneyWorld. I went there on my honeymoon and then we took the family there on our 13th wedding anniversary—because we were married on a Friday the 13th. Which is kind of fun in and of itself. :)


100. I really like writing in this blog, even though I don’t seem to manage to get to it as often as I used to. I will do better. It is a new goal. Okay, it is an old goal, but one I hope to actually achieve one of these days.


DONE. :) You need to go get a nice beverage to reward yourself for sitting through this one. Thanks for reading my 100th blog.

Blogging in 2011

I always seem to surprise myself on how long I go between posts here. Already April and I haven't posted a single blog post. I will say that I have been writing on my blog for the past couple of months in anticipation for my 100th blog post.
This one is number 99.


Number 100 just got finished, but then I realized that one of the number I was counting is just in drafts, so you can only see 98.



So this is a random blog written with the sole purpose of taking up space to get to #100.




Doesn't say much about the quality of this post I suppose. I will have to come up with something interesting to mention so that it doesn't waste your time....

Hmmm...



Instead of posting words, I will post photos of the 4 celebs I mention in my 100th posting that I really like. A little 'eye-candy' will hopefully go a long way toward forgiving my lack of interesting posts. :) These guys are favorites of mine. I don't think they need introduction or explanation. :0)



In age order:





[sigh]


Yep. The old "a picture is worth a thousand words" should work just fine here. Hope you enjoyed this post #99. Post #100 will be up either later today or tomorrow. Just so you know. And if you don't know someone in the above pictures just ask. I'll be surprised, but ask anyway...:)