Monday, April 19, 2010

In Case You Missed My Rambling Ways :)

It has been 5 months since I have added to my blog. Yes, FIVE flew by for me, and all the spam comments I just 86'd only emphasized the fact that I really should check my blog more often.

I probably should write more frequently if for no other reason than to take some of the pressure off for writing something brilliant. I mean, if I haven't written for five months surely something fabulous has happened or some extraordinary mental genius has come to my attention to write about here.


Okay, I was dreaming too.

Really the only great insight I have made lately is that I am shocked that a six year old child who has grown up in this household thinks that if he throws himself on the ground screaming and arching his back to emphasize his world collapse as he knows it, will somehow get me to change my answer from "No" to "Yes".

Why do my kids (all of them, really) think that whining will make me want to jump up and do whatever it is that will make them happy.

You would think that after all this time with having me as the mom, they would realize that I am just as thrilled to keep saying 'no' when they are throwing fits as I was the first time I said 'no'. More so, actually. I start getting a kick out of calmly stepping over the thrashing form of child and going about my merry way.

The old "what part of no did you not understand" is probably over used in our house, but seriously. The first time I change the "no" to a "yes" because I don't want to hear the screaming fit anymore will be the end of my reign as 'Queen' here, and I will just become a lowly peasant placed here to cater to the children's every whim.

I soooo don't need that.

I keep waiting for my kids to get old enough that reasoning with them works. To figure out that their actions have consequences. That no means no--and that I rarely say no just for the heck of it.

I think my mom is probably still waiting for me to figure those things out too.

I want to keep this post kind of short just so I make sure I actually post the blog. So to end, here are 5 things I have learned over the past few weeks that have to do with my kids:

1. 5 minutes in the microwave is too long for microwave popcorn. It scorches. And it makes the house smell bad for a solid 24 hours.

2. 6 year old boys and 5 year old girls should not be allowed to use a microwave unsupervised. (See #1) --['allowed' is a tricky word there....if they don't ask permission, they don't hear 'no'. They hear 'NOOO!!', but by then they have had their fun. :) ]

3. A 10 year old boy can hold an entire conversation about video games in a way that seems like I should understand at least a few of the words coming out of his mouth, but ends up with me zoning out--like when Grandma used to tell her meter-maid stories for the 50th time--instead of me trying to keep up with the whozits and the whatzits of the gaming world.

4. I have moody daughters. I was hoping to get a pass on that, since I am not the moody type. I guess with 5 girls, my odds were stacked against me anyway.

5. I must really love my son to be able to sit though an "opera" about the rock cycle that was completely written by four classes of 4th graders, and still act thrilled to be there. He did a marvelous job. It was a solid hour of "Holy crap, how did Doug get so lucky to be out of town this week on business?" And honestly the 5 minutes my kid was onstage made it worth it--he was "Joker Rock" and had to do a staged fall that ended up being him really tripping over his monkey slippers and hitting his goggled face into the stage. Looked like it hurt, but he was sure it was a sign that he is a really good actor to make the fall more real. I could have done without the other 55 minutes, but what the heck. I now know more about the rock cycle than I ever wanted to know.

(My parents can thank me later for 'forgetting' to mention the opera to them, so they didn't have to sit through it too. :) )

I will start writing more regularly again. I guess that can be good or bad depending on your take on my blog I suppose.

If nothing else, I have not forgotten how to ramble. So I have that going for me.